I was at a friend's house not long ago for tea when she asked me, as friends sometimes do, for my opinion on the state of her living room. The space was lovely and bright, but as I entered the first thing I noticed was this pile of boxes in one corner.
Before I go on, it's important to note that this corner was fairytale famous. I had heard legends of this corner. Six-fingered man, evil step-mother, endless sleep legends of this land. I had been warned of this corner, warned of this "messy" living room. From all of these warnings and legends I braced myself for a 20 year fight.
What could be inside these boxes?
The tale goes that the boxes had been there for years bringing great sorrow and shame on the kingdom, uh, apartment. Surely, the contents of those boxes were explosive! Emotional landmines just waiting to cause weeks of fetal position sobbing.
Old love letters? The ashes of a beloved cat? A wobbly old mixed tape?
I asked and braced myself for the answer.
The boxes were full of.... Wait for it...
NOTHING!
Nothing? Really? All that angst, all that shame for... nothing?
That's right. Nichts, nada, rien, 0... Nothing!
To be fair, my friend, S, is not the only person with a pile of empty boxes masquerading as boxes of doom. I've seen it time and time again working with clients. The corner we've spent weeks/months/years skirting around is indeed filled with empty boxes.
The interesting thing about S' case, is this. At the same time as the empty boxes were taking up a good deal of her physical space, she also found herself in a feather wisp of a relationship. The label said relationship but the contents said just friends, no benefits. Not only that, she was half working at a job that took this hilarious, beautiful, creative being and reduced her to eye circles and belly aches.
I'm sure you're eager to find out how the fairy tale ends. I'm happy to report that after flinging the empty boxes S' life began to change, and fast. Out went the relationship! Au revoir went the job! In short time she said howdy to a love affair with yoga and yes, even hola to a sweet man.
Empty boxes can come in all shapes and sizes. Square, rectangular, or they could be that relationship that is already over, that job you hate or the path you're walking in someone else's shoes.
Sometimes those boxes are hard to see, but once you do it's your duty to break them down and take them out on recycling day. Don't worry, you'll find some really good empty boxes when you need them, and in the meantime you can befriend dragons, ride unicorns and most definitely go to the ball...
Do you have any empty boxes in your space or life? I'd love to hear about them below!
Take care,
Cecilia Moorcroft
Practice IS the Point!
I recently moved into a new apartment which needed to be painted BIG time. I'm talking every single square inch, the insides of closets, every ceiling, the stairs...EVERYTHING.
In my mind the painting couldn't take more than a few hours per room, right? Wrong! Each room took three days to finish top to bottom. Three days!!!
This is what painting was in my mind:
- Roll the roller up and down the walls a few times
- Step back to admire my work
This is painting in reality:
- Move furniture and remove electrical outlet covers
- Fill in all the holes
- Wait for the holes to dry
- Sand the holes
- Wash the walls
- Put down drop cloths
- Paint the edges of the ceiling
- Paint the whole ceiling
- Wait for the ceiling to dry
- Repeat steps 7-9
- Paint the edges of the walls with primer
- Paint the walls with primer
- Wait for the walls to dry
- Repeat steps 11-13 (if the walls are really dark)
- Repeat steps 11-13 twice more with the paint colour of choice
- Tape the walls and floor around the baseboards, window sills and doors
- Paint the baseboards, window sills and doors
- Wait for the baseboards, window sills and doors to dry
- Repeat steps 16-18
- Take the tape off
- Pick up drop cloths
- Clean up little paint spills
- Vacuum
- Mop
- Move the furniture back in and replace the electrical outlet covers
- (add several more steps for kitchen cupboards, closets, stairs, unforeseen trim, nooks and crannies as well as putting away brushes, cleaning brushes, running to Home Depot because you've run out of paint, tape, sandpaper, more paint, more tape etc... etc... etc...)
As I worked, I grumbled and cursed through all of the "prep" work and "clean up" work. I just wanted to get to the "real" painting without all this extra noise. I wanted it to be the way I thought it would be, with two simple steps. Paint and enjoy! It took me awhile, but room by room something started to dawn on me...
Maybe this is what painting is. Painting is the WHOLE process. Painting is not one step, it is ALL the steps! Filing the holes is painting, washing the walls is painting, taping is painting, cleaning up is painting, running to Home Depot is painting. It's all painting!
It got me thinking of all the things in life that feel like practice, like preparation:
- The work that you do for a BA, MA, PhD
- The hours you practice for a concert/play
- The writing you do every morning
- The drawings you crumple and throw away
- The veggies you chop
- The recipes you test
- The dance moves you try
- The seeds you plant
- The clothes you sew/knit/crochet and rip out
- The clutter you clear
- The first draft
- The boring photographs
- The crappy meditations
- The bad dates
- Etc... Etc...
The years of prep work, of practice, of trying, of seeking, of seeding, of weeding, of waiting...
You see, it's all the point. Practice IS the point!
This is life my friends. Yes, there are the performances, the graduations, the great dates, the openings, the launches, the weddings, the births, the deaths. But all that stuff in between, all the mistakes you make, all the prep, the learning, the clean up and the recovery. THAT is living and living is the point...
Take care,
Cecilia Moorcroft
A Lovely Day to Love Yourself!
Happy Valentines Day! I know that today is generally all about how much you love other people and how much money you can spend to prove it.
Let this be a short and sweet invitation to Choo Choo Choose YOU this February 14th. An invitation to BEE friends with yourself!
What are some ways that you can show yourself a little love?
You could...
- Write yourself a love letter and send it
- Wear those extra special undies
- Wear anything cashmere
- Have a bath with sea salt and a few of drops of rose oil
- Eat something energizing
- Use the "good" china
- Treat yourself to a pair of fabulous socks
- Take yourself on a date
- Walk in the woods
- Ask to pet the cute dog
- Visit neighbourhood cats
- Make a snow angel
- Dance in your living room
- Make a craft for YOU
- Stretch and breathe
- Use every cream, lotion, bubble bath, deep conditioner, bath bomb, face mask and blush that you've been "saving"
- Take an hour to read in your favorite chair with a cup of tea
- Buy yourself flowers
- Turn off the computer
- Put on your fuzzy slippers
What do you do when you need to feel extra loved? I'd love to hear it in the comments below!
Take care,
Cecilia Moorcroft